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Fr. China
Topic: The agony of being rich, young and beautiful in China
Ernai: 二奶 [èrnǎi] – kept woman; second wife; mistress
Xiaosan: 小三 [xiǎosān]: Another name for kept woman, mistress. Literally “little three”, three being the third person in the relationship. Interchangeable with Ernai. 

On the micro blogs I saw this story: going to work, riding in coworker’s car in early morning, when waiting for a red light, there was a “Cayenne” next to us. It was a beautiful girl, so I rolled down the window and took a look. My coworker said it confidently “must be an Ernai (二奶: [èrnǎi] – kept woman; mistress)”. Maybe it was too loud the girl heard us and looked a little annoyed. Green light, we hurried and took off, but the Cayenne gassed and caught up on us, rolling down her window, shouted at us “Ever seen an Ernai going to work this early? ****!”
I laughed hard but felt a strong emotion and relied: yesterday, when got off work and going home, I was sitting on the passenger’s seat and my husband was driving. A driver of GG deliberately rolled down his windows and looked at me, and spoke loudly to the person next to him, “look, this Ernai is actually pretty.” My husband was very depressed and said “I turned out to be your driver.”
My colleagues comforted me “being called Ernai proves that you are still young, beautiful and charismatic.” I was ashamed; it was not the first or second time I am called an Ernai. Yes, I carry a LV bag, drive a BMW X6 and wear Cartier on my hand, but does that mean I am an Ernai?
Of course there are colleagues asking me, why are you still working? Isn’t this bullying other people? I felt strange, why can’t I go to work? Who did I bother being a person with a job and useful to the society?
What depresses me the most is that even the bosses have such thinking. One day I wore newly purchased Prada, with a CHANEL pearl necklace, showing off to my boss and asked him if I looked like a star or a model. He said seriously, “like a Xiaosan (小三 [xiǎosān]: Another name for kept woman, mistress. Literally “little three”, three being the third person in the relationship. Interchangeable with Ernai)”.
I thought of one of my female friends, she used to work for an IPO company and got a lot of stocks, then she switched to work for a media company. She drove a Mercedes Benz to work every day, early morning shift that needs her to be at work at 7 am, but her coworkers all talk behind her back, saying she often changes her Hermes, LV Gucci purses, must be a kept Xiaosan.
She felt helpless, and said “people don’t see my hard work every day; only see my purses and car?” I comforted her, “I am even worse than you”. Once at an event, a coal boss asked me directly if I was interested to be his Ernai, before this there were countless men said they want to “keep” me, and asked me seriously “how about 500,000 a year?” Should we all think it over, is it that we look like Ernai? or should all the pretty girls become Ernai and not to work?
Pretty MM deserve to be called Ernai, no matter how hard you work, how you prove your abilities, we are only Ernai in other people’s eyes? Do all this bother anyone? We are not able to buy the LV, CHANEL, Hermes and BMW on our own? It is only possible if someone else’s husband bought them for us?
Our conditions may be quite superior in the eyes of others, but we are the same as all white-collar workers. We also have to work nine to five, and even morning shifts and night shifts. We also have to eat lunch, and often go to work hungry; we also care about work. The purpose of the work is no more than supporting the family and achieving our personal values and respect. All of these intentions are the same; we also have our goals and ideals!
Our money is hard-earned with our own hands. I have a friend doing SP business, running around meeting business clients day and night, her loses her voice all year around. Her annual income is hundreds of thousands, but her family was suspicious and asked her if she was kept buy some old man.
Another girlfriend works for an advertising business. She accompanies clients drinking every day, runs all over the country, until too much drinking caused her to vomit blood and she almost had an abortion. She worked so hard, a six-figure monthly income should be normal! However when she was driving a newly purchased MINI cooper home, her boyfriend asked her which of her lovers gave her the car.
When a young girl has a little money, they will be labeled as Ernai or Xiaosan, I do not know if our society is too twisted or people are too marrow-mined to accept some facts. Is it true only if you have rich and power parents, then the money in your hands is your own money? Or maybe hang a picture of your husband on my face, to prove that I have an identity? Not an Ernai or Xiaosan? Your husband better be young and handsome, or else if he looks older, people will think I was a mistress and later became the wife!
We can’t make our own money? Do we only know how to spend men’s money? Finally, quoting the story in the beginning, “Have you ever seen an Ernai going to work this early? ” 
31 Mar 2010
Fr. Australia
Seriously? Who asks their boss if they
look like a star or a model??
01 Apr 2010

replied by Cloudservices on 19:22:23 27 Jul
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Fr. China
People are just jealous of those women who seem to be so
perfect with beauty and money.And even in nowadays ,women
are still considered to be weaker than men .This is unfair
but it is the fact.All you can do ,just be confident ,be
yourself ,work hard ,play hard ,enjoy life and never put
those twisted minds from others in heart .As a saying
goes,peple who understand you are always much less than
those who do not understand you in this world.You can't stop
people talking something bad about you behind ur back,but
you can choose not to listen to them.
01 Apr 2010

Fr. Singapore
It is a choice based on your values -
comfort, money, prestige being "xxxnai"
or work hard, work smart, make alot of
WOX friends and make alot of money. As
in this situation, it takes 2 hands to
clap, it is mutual but it does not
prevent future possible consequences if
the relationship did not get well. It
will fall through - just like the
previous case all the "xxxnai" reported
his misdeeds.
01 Apr 2010

Fr. India
well we can not change the narrow minded mentality of
society. sometimes there is some hidden jealosy behind these
comments...just go along your path dear..don't bother about
the comments..
01 Apr 2010

Fr. Germany
Oh, poor woman has to suffer so much
because she wears Prada and Gucci. Such
an evil world we are living in...
01 Apr 2010

Fr. Tonga
I must agree with Ozgal, "who" asks their boss if they look
like a star or a model? But who am I to judge?
Nevertheless, I must say that this is news for me. ErNai and
Xiaosan. More new vocabs to learn.
02 Apr 2010

Fr. Australia
Society is to blame. Protecting and glorifying personal
image by purchasing name brands to be seen as wealthy. So
many new rich in this country. Would it be asking too much
to read an article about the progress of philanthropy in
China, or at least one case of the rich putting something
back into the communist system?
02 Apr 2010

Fr. France
Benny, i owe u one for that well we live in a
c'try thats on two extremes with a majority of about 60%
below poverty lines at one end,but care much about buying
Louis Vuittons & wearing cartiers and all what not...its a
pity!i wonder if the 55-year-old looking ladies i see almost
on a quotidian basis carrying pick-axes n shovels heading
for construction sites do catch the attention of the young
rich girls cruising in cayennes,porsches n x6's?
06 Apr 2010

Fr. France
Benny, i owe u one for that well we live in a
c'try thats on two extremes with a majority of about 60%
below poverty lines at one end,but care much about buying
Louis Vuittons & wearing cartiers and all what not...its a
pity!i wonder if the 55-year-old looking ladies i see almost
on a quotidian basis carrying pick-axes n shovels heading
for construction sites do catch the attention of the young
rich girls cruising in cayennes,porsches n x6's?
06 Apr 2010

Fr. Russian Federation
Wear Cartier, LV, Gucci, i'll advice roberto cavalli ;) just
dont be stupid showing it off!

TAke example from well-educated rich people, royal families -
u'll never see them showing of what they have!

More than 80% of people are jelous to someone's success and
if you just push everyone to see what did you rich - than
blame just yourself.

Let people get used to know that there are smart confident
girls!!! China is too traditional... in this case just time
will put everything in the order. not to show the car?))) - in this case f...k them
all - enjoy the ride!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
11 Apr 2010

Fr. France
So in China if you are a woman and wear one luxury item,
people think it is fake, thus you are no one.
If you add to that a BMW (or other German/Italian fancy car)
and some more real, very pricy clothes or accessories, then
they think you are a whore.
I love China. Now it would be good if they could think the
same way for men. ^_^
11 Apr 2010

Fr. Russian Federation
+1 to XMren
12 Apr 2010

Fr. South Georgia and the South Sandwich Isl
Plastic people with little substance. I'd sooner spend my
time with the common man/woman on the street, than the Gucci
wearing, Porsche driving Chinaratti..
15 Apr 2010

Fr. Philippines
How many classrooms or clinics in poor
countryside can be built with the cost
of one prada bag or cartier watch....
Hay. These rich girls whine about being
thought of as an ernai or xiaosan. Some
poor folks don't even know where their
next meal will come from, or if they are
going to have any. Some perspective, eh.

And if the author really IS working hard
to deserve such high income, then why is
it that even her boss (when asked with
such improper question) thinks she's a
xiaosan? Maybe because she's not
supposed to be able to afford such
luxuries with her salary or job? Besides
who wears pearl necklace to the office
other than the first lady and the queen?!

Thanks for the new vocabs anyway.
20 Apr 2010

Fr. Not Known
Rich woman in China, drives a flashy car and wears nice clothes.......bloody great if you ask me. Love to see beautiful well dressed girls driving around in a top car. Makes me wish I was sitting next to her. then Id be the flash GUY sitting next to the flash GIRL in the flash CAR cars faster than yours and my sexy well dressed girl is driving it. But as a child I will always remember the saying..."Jealousy gets you nowhere"
18 Jul 2010

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